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Some Nerd Girl

Some Like It Nerdy

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October 2015

Looking Skywards

‘Looking Skywards’ is part of a multi-post series where the writers of Some Nerd Girl share their Origin Stories – in other words, when and how did the nerdening happen?!

It’s hard to say when I first became a nerd. My earliest memories include my mom reading me J.R.R. Tolkein’s Letters to Father Christmas, and, later, excerpts from Anne McCaffrey’s The Dragonriders of Pern series. I’ve always been fascinated with the natural world, and was a pretty outdoorsy kid. And from an early age I loved stargazing. However, even if I can’t narrow my entry to nerdom specifically, there are a few discrete events that definitely set me on my current path.

The first one I can think of is when I was 7 or so, my parents took me to the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum in D.C. At some point during that trip, they decided to treat my twin brother and I to a showing at the IMAX theater. The film we saw was a documentary narrated by none other than Leonard Nimoy, entitled Destiny in Space.

DestinyInSpace

To be honest, the film actually hasn’t aged all that well, but at the time, the imagery absolutely captivated me. Soaring over the newly radar-mapped terrain of Venus. Watching Mars become slowly more Earth-like as it was terraformed. Astronauts spacewalking above the surface of the Earth. From that point on, I had been bitten by the space bug, and I got it bad.

A few years later, at a Scholastic Bookfair (remember those?) my brother picked up a beautiful illustrated paperback, entitled Extraterrestrial: A Field Guide for Earthlings. It was the first book I had ever come across that presented the possibility of alien life as a serious scientific topic. It imagined how actual extraterrestrial lifeforms might evolve under a variety of environmental conditions, what sense organs they might use, possible body layouts, and even speculated on more radical forms of life that we might not even initially recognize. While it didn’t seem like as a big of idea at the time, the idea that aliens were a concept that could be seriously addressed scientifically stuck with me.

Although this guy doesn't help _at all_.
Although this guy doesn’t help at all.

As I hit middle school, I became increasingly interested in the sciences. Unsurprisingly, I also got more into science fiction, as well. After cutting my teeth on my mom’s old Andre Norton and Anne McCaffrey paperbacks (guess where I got my scifi gene from?), I started exploring the science fiction and fantasy section of the local library. First, I read mostly McCaffrey, but soon serendipitous discoveries lead me to other authors. The cover of Ringworld intrigued me, and introduced me to Larry Niven, who’s hard science fiction I devoured (I was particularly fond of the Known Space series). Via The Moon is a Harsh Mistress, I discovered Robert Heinlein, though I found a lot of his writings a bit more difficult to get into (I did slog through most of I Will Fear No Evil, but I had additional motivation). Later my list of favorite authors would include Alfred Bester, Rodger Zelanzy, Neal Stephenson, Lois McMaster Bujold (who’s Vorkosigan Saga is one of my current favorites), Connie Willis, Ursula K. LeGuin, and Neil Gaiman.

So... much... great... sci fi!
So… much… great… sci fi!

Also, as an aside, I became a massive band geek, and would later have the distinction of being That One Guy in the Piccolo Section, but that’s another story for another day.

As I made it into high school, naturally I began to think about college and careers. Unsurprisingly, I looked at space-related careers – considering being perhaps an astronomer or astrophysicist, or maybe an aerospace engineer. I would later back down from both of those careers as, at the time, I thought they’d be too math intensive for me (ironically, my actual work now is focused pretty much exclusively on mathematical modeling). In any case, the question was somewhat incidental – from age 12 onward, I knew what I really wanted to do was be an astronaut – but I figured I should at least have some options.

However, towards the end of high school, I somehow stumbled upon a new and upcoming field of study: astrobiology, the study of the origin, evolution, and distribution of life throughout the universe, including beyond Earth. While I was still fascinated with studying life beyond Earth from a scientific point of view, I had no idea that this was a real area of study, with NASA support and everything. I suddenly knew what I wanted to do with my life.

This. Changes. Everything!
This. Changes. Everything!

In college, wanting to cover all my bases, I double majored in astronomy and biology, and did my senior paper for my astronomy degree on the possibility of biosignatures on Mars. During the summer before my senior year, I also got the opportunity to intern at NASA, analyzing images of Jupiter’s moon Europa from the Hubble Space Telescope; to date, that experience remains the best summer job I’ve ever had.

Recognize!
Recognize! Yes, I was geeking out a little!

At some point, I went to a talk given by former astronaut Kathy Thornton, who mentioned off-hand that having a terminal degree (e.g., a PhD or an M.D.) was a requirement to have a serious chance of being selected into the astronaut corps. While I don’t want to say this single-handedly persuaded me to go to grad school, it certainly sealed the deal.

I eventually located a graduate school that had an astrobiology lab (there are about a dozen universities in the U.S. that are involved in astrobiology research), though, ironically, rather than astronomy or biology, it was actually housed in the geology and environmental science departments. I got my first chance to do real scientific research – the topic I eventually focused on was using mathematical modeling to help understand microbial ecosystems that exist in extreme environments (underneath glaciers, in hot springs, and so forth). The hope is to use these models to try to characterize what constitutes a habitable environment for life (for example, if we find microbial communities underneath the ice sheets of Antarctica, is it possible similar communities exist underneath the polar cap of Mars), and what sorts of detectable effects those ecosystems have on their environments (this may sound dry, but it isn’t; my master’s thesis involved this place).

Here I am, doing science-y stuff!
Here I am, doing science-y stuff!

At the moment, I’m currently working on my PhD in the subject. My dream job is to be a researcher for NASA, being on the cutting edge in our search for life throughout our Solar System. Following this path has allowed me to embrace my nerdiness to new levels, turning a passion into a career (and if you think cons are nerdy, wait until you experience a science conference). I’ve gone from reading science fiction to pretty much living it (I’m a gender-changing scientist who hunts for aliens- tell me my life isn’t the plot of a New Wave scifi story from the early ’70s). And I’m sure there’s even greater heights of nerdiness awaiting me on my journey.

And for the record, no matter what, I still fully intend to become an astronaut.


Tess

Tessa is a 28 year old PhD student, and perhaps the world’s only queer trans astrobiologist. A nerd going way back, her interests include science fiction, space exploration, sustainability, science communication, and feminism and gender. Her hobbies also include horseback riding, playing the flute, social dancing, knitting, and occasional attempts at writing fiction. She currently resides in Tempe, AZ with her even nerdier fiancee and a mastiff mix who thinks he’s a lapdog. She tweets occasionally @spacermase.

Difficult Conversations: Nerd Culture and Sexual Harassment

At their core, pop culture conventions are meant to be lighthearted, fun events where people with similar interests can meet like-minded people and embrace their nerdy sides. I can honestly say that on a good convention day, I wouldn’t rather be anywhere else. But conventions and the culture surrounding them have an ugly dark side, one that terrorizes women and men alike and thrives off of sexism. Cosplayers are groped, con-goers are attacked, and people are stalked, screamed at, and flamed. There’s an elephant out on the convention floor, and its sexual harassment.

Who’s your favorite female video character? What about your top ten favorites? How many of those female characters display ludicrous amounts of cleavage, ass, or legs?

The answer is gonna be 'most of them.'
The answer is gonna be ‘most of them.’

Now, look up some cosplays of those characters, and read the comments. Take a shot every time you read a comment vilifying the cosplayer for wearing that same outfit. Finish your drink if you see “Slut” or “Whore”. Annnd now you’re dead.

On the con floor, many female cosplayers are cat-called, groped, and generally meant to feel unwelcome. Even outside conventions, cosplayers who choose to make replicas of the sexy costumes of their favorite characters face vitriol and gross harassment. On social media, female cosplayers are accused of being attention or actual whores for daring to show cleavage accurate to a character’s design. A design meant to pander to males in the first place. And even though women face the brunt of the problem, it’s not just men who are harassers. While less known, there are reports of ladies acting inappropriately with male cosplayers as well.

These guys could probably tell you all about it.
These guys could probably tell you all about it.

And if you’re thinking, ‘well why would they wear such revealing outfits they don’t want attention?’ ask yourself this. What sort of attention are cosplayers looking for?

There’s a lot I love about wearing a costume to a convention. I love seeing people’s eyes light up when they spot their favorite character, I love when people ask my permission to take pictures of a cosplay I’m proud of, I love when people high-five me and I admit, I do enjoy the compliments I get on my look. These are the forms of attention I hope for when I cosplay.When I’m getting ready for a con I put on my cosplay and I think ‘I hope other people enjoy this!’ I don’t put on my cosplay and think, ‘gee, I sure hope this gets people to violate me.’

Sexual harassment isn’t just limited to cosplayers either. Five years ago I was molested at a convention. It was my first big convention, and I’d changed out of my cosplay back into street clothes to go to a dance the con held. He was handsome, confident, and grown up, and I was fourteen, naïve and too young to understand the way he’d looked at me – too young to know that grown men don’t ask little girls to ‘dance’ with them. My story was not as isolated incident either, and I’ve heard many similar stories of young girls at conventions being taken advantage of by predators.

Where is this for conventions??
Where is this for conventions??

Three years after the incident I returned to the convention where I’d been assaulted, and almost as soon as I walked in my attention was caught by a booth run by young women who seemed to be handing out little decks of cards.

“We’re trying to raise awareness and help stop sexual harassment of cosplayers and con-goers.” One of the girls told me, energized, but gentle too. “Have you ever experienced sexual harassment at a convention?”

I bowed my head and mumbled yes, and the woman handed me a deck of colorful laminated cards. “Take these.” She said. I read the cards over.

“What you just did was harassment.” The red card said. “You have grossly stepped over the boundary of acceptable social communication.”

The yellow card was somewhat kinder. “What you just did was harassment.” It read. “Maybe you didn’t realize. In the future, think harder about the way your actions may be perceived.”

The only card I hoped I had to use was the green one. “You stepped in to help stop harassment.” It read. “Thank you.”

HarassmentCards

It brought me back to the people I saw four years ago; the people who saw me. What I remembered most about that horrible day wasn’t his hands tangled up in the hair hanging at my hips, but the people who looked at us and laughed as they passed me by, as if my gross violation were just an inside joke between them and the convention.

And maybe it was, at least at the time. But I truly believe that things are changing now. Sexual harassment is still a far-too-common problem in convention and cosplay culture, but the difference is that by now, people have noticed. Sexual harassment at conventions is no longer the shameful secret it once was. More articles are being written, more videos being filmed, more booths run, more outrage and cries for change. People are infinitely more aware of the fact that sexual harassment is a problem at conventions, and with that awareness comes change.

So simple, but you have no idea what a difference it can make.
So simple, but you have no idea what a difference it can make.

I don’t know if I’ll ever feel safe enough to go to a convention by myself again, but at least I can say that with the increased awareness of sexual harassment, conventions feel like places to have fun again. That booth that gave me hope last year wasn’t tucked into a dark corner, but set up so it would be impossible to ignore, and that alone displays a huge shift in the way sexual harassment is approached now. Sexual harassment is no longer an issue con-goers snicker at, and if we continue to call attention to the issue, then perhaps those who thrived under the shadow of shame and ignorance will find that they no longer have the cover they need to hide their wrongs.

I would love to see situations where I’d be able to use that green card those amazing women gave me, and I would like to personally ask any fellow con-goers reading this article to keep an eye out for harassment. Stopping sexual harassment can be as easy as stepping in and asking what’s going on, and the worst that could happen is that it was a misunderstanding and everyone is fine. Don’t be afraid to speak out and up! You may just become someone’s real-life hero.


Rebecca2Rebecca is the daughter of two Mexican immigrants who lovingly support her nerdier hobbies. She is a cosplayer, con-goer, anime lover and lifelong writer who’s had several short pieces of fiction and poetry published under her very long name. She has also recently finished writing her first novel, a young adult adventure book with LGBT characters. She is a new college student and is currently majoring in biomedical engineering.

08 Going to the Grocery Store – Some Nerd Girl Original Webcomic

Just try to take away my junk food when I’m hungry, I dare you! The struggle is real.

Join us every Monday for a new, original Some Nerd Girl webcomic!


AlexAlex is our resident Webcomic creator. He grew up in Puerto Rico, but didn’t reach true Nerdom until he came state side when he was in middle school. He’s been drawing since he was five, but has only started posting Webcomics in the past year. You can check out his amazing and original work at tapastic.com/gomezalexj.

From Introvert to Extrovert: The Power of the Nerd Community

I admire those who can boldly walk up to a random person, introduce themselves, and within ten minutes have a new friend; what is easy for them can take me ten days, if not weeks, to do as an introvert with mild social anxiety. As an introvert, I am naturally quiet, but with social anxiety added into the mix, it can be a completely different story. Crowds, strangers, and new social situations can make me feel constantly on edge. I can get extremely skittish in tightly packed crowds, and an occasional near panic attack is not unheard of in such situations. Yet I – the girl who has actively avoided taking a Speech course throughout her entire college career thus far – absolutely love attending Dragon Con. This year specifically has provided the chance to truly break me out of my shell, and I owe it to a few close friends and 70K+ con attendees.

OMG, ALL OF THE PEOPLE
OMG, ALL OF THE PEOPLE…

Surprisingly, this year was not my first time at Dragon Con. That honor goes to 2014. My first ever time at such a large convention actually turned out to be a wonderful one thanks to the Dragon Con veterans who took me under their wing. They were able to prepare me for what to expect (lines, and cosplays, and geeks, oh my!) and acted as my guides over the four day experience. Their presence helped keep me calm in the hustle and bustle, and they acted as social buffers for any interactions I was involved in. My anxiety still played a part in the trip but because of them, I never felt overwhelmed. Upon returning home from the trip, I knew I had to return for 2015.

However, life is funny and not everything goes as planned, so I went into this year’s convention with more than a little hesitation. After all, everything leading up to the convention weekend seemed to go wrong. First, our attempt to book with the Hyatt failed, solidifying Passkey’s infamous reputation. This resulted in a very frantic reservation to the Marriott… a well-known party hub, particularly at night.

Damn you, PassKey, damn you to hell!
Damn you, PassKey, damn you to hell!

Oh dear, my social anxiety squeaked. This won’t be good.

Second, a few close friends had to give their regretful cancellations in the final hours before the trip due to understandable life events. A bummer for sure in any situation, but this left my social and makeshift stranger buffer much smaller than last year. With my safety net greatly reduced, I would be forced to leave my comfort zone. In turn, I was presented with a unique but frightening opportunity.

Just remember: be cool, Heather. Be cool.
Just remember: be cool, Heather. Be cool.

Instead of concentrating on the negatives, I decided to take this as a challenge to branch out a bit in order to overcome some of my social anxiety. But how would I go about making this an adventure?

During Dragon Con ‘14 I had been surrounded by very lovely cosplays but had been entirely too shy and/or intimidated to ask anyone for a photograph of their hard work. Not only was the simple fact of asking itself terrifying, I was afraid of inconveniencing people or being judged for asking a stranger for a photo, so I missed out on many beautiful photographs I regret not taking.

This year I decided I would make a change. I did not want my anxiety to interfere with my con experience anymore. Friday morning I gave myself one personal goal: I would find a single cosplay I enjoyed, walk up to the individual, and request a photo. Sounds simple enough, right? For most people it is – they can it to do without a second thought. For me, it would be a monumental step forward.

A hilarious early morning Milk fed Criminal Masterminds panel left me feeling pumped up and ready to take on the world.

How could this not?!
How could this not?!

As luck would have it, on my way to my next scheduled panel I passed by a fantastic version of the Tenth Doctor and Madame de Pompadour from Doctor Who. With a deep breath to gather up the remaining pluckiness inspired by the panel, I marched (read: timidly walked) up to them to request a photograph. Much to my delight, they were happy to oblige. I snapped a quick picture before my nerves vibrated me out of existence, thanked them, and walked away beaming.

Success!!
Success!!

This couple did not realize their small but highly positive interaction left a big impact on the rest of my weekend. Our brief encounter had me feeling empowered. I had set out to do something and done it; I had not let my anxiety win. I was proud of myself! Thanks in no tiny part to them, I was able to get over my initial shyness, and as the weekend continued, each time I approached another cosplayer became easier. An unintentional side effect of accomplishing this small feat? It led to me feeling overall more relaxed in the geek hordes. Who knew such a seemingly inconsequential ordeal could lead to something more?

Most importantly, all of this would help when Saturday night rolled around, the night we traditionally set aside to explore the parties.

I had been sharing various Snapchats of events with the people who could not attend this year. One of those friends suggested I use this chance to do a Dragon Con themed scavenger hunt. She would send me subjects that went from assorted “easy” themes (Marvel character, Nintendo character, gender bend), to moderate themes (“fandom you don’t know – bonus for asking what fandom it was from”), to what would be personally hard for me (“walking up to someone and asking them to dance with them”).

Frankly, it sounded like a blast so I was instantly game for it.

Star Wars - found!
Star Wars – found!
BioShock, check!
Bioshock, check!

The scavenger hunt turned out to be a great way to interact with people at the parties. Every new item I would be given gave me a new reason to weave in and out of the mass of people in my search to mark the item off my checklist, and the hunt itself served as the perfect, fun ice breaker. By the end of the night, I was confidently introducing myself to people, a nearly unheard of thing for me. The very last task – dance with a random person – was even successfully marked off the scavenger list. I danced terribly, but I danced with pride.

You know you want in on this action.
You know you want in on this action.

Every year brings about a different experience, and for me, Dragon Con ’15 turned into an adventure in self-discovery. Who knew I could happily go out of my way to speak to utter strangers – let alone dance with one? Definitely not the girl from ’14! This year inspired me to test my boundaries, leading me to feel more comfortable in my own skin as I grew a little more confident with each new accomplishment. The pride I had from those little triumphs has spilled over into my real life, too. I find myself a little less edgy in crowds, and although being around new people is still nowhere near pleasant for me, I feel I can manage the situation better.

With ’15 wrapped up, the prep work for Dragon Con ’16 has already started. Tickets have already been purchased, the hotel has been reserved, and the wait for the guest list has begun. The only thing left to do is decide on a new personal goal.

You know, I have never cosplayed before…


HeatherHeather is a bookworm with a varied Goodreads, although if you are looking for reviews in the romance genre, your princess is in another castle. She’s a passionate console gamer who is diving headfirst back into comics after a long hiatus. She once met Patrick Stewart and played it cool; she met Babs Tarr and fangirled an embarrassing amount. You can follow her on Twitter @MissHWilliamson, where she has a habit of live tweeting (particularly The Walking Dead).

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